How to Heal Your Pain from The Root
Often when we are upset, the thing we think we are upset about isn’t actually the root cause of our problems. If we keep talking, or writing, what is going on in our minds, we can see that where our mental train of thought starts is not where it ends up. Take the time to keep asking yourself why you are feeling a certain way. Often it will take some time to uncover the deeper issue. The one you can actually resolve to find a beneficial outcome, overall, in your life.
The issue that superficially presents itself is often a trigger for deeper emotional pain or mental disfunction.
When you can work through the pain and limitations that are in your mind, see them objectively, you will be able to see that the issue here is avoidance.
Pain is not from the issue itself, but from avoiding the issue. From being mad at the discomfort. Get comfortable with being uncomfortable. Simply knowing that these emotions can’t hurt you. They are giving you a signal. Until we decipher the signal they will stay present with us.
So our only choice is to be present with them. Be curious. Be compassionate with our negative emotions. It’s not easy. I’m not saying it’s easy. But be empathetic. Ask yourself what you need right now to be okay? Ask what is truly bothering you. Be patient. Treat your inner self like a child. Your emotions are innocent yet misunderstood. They are only trying to teach you something. They are only trying so so hard to let you know what you need.
The more painful the emotion the more patient and loving you need to be. Nurture yourself in every way, mind, body, spirit.
You can’t push the negative away. My counsellor said it like this: your mind is like a bus. The passengers are like your thoughts and feelings. They will come and go. There will be passengers that you don’t like, that are rude or mean or you plain miserable. You can’t just punch them in the face (my suggestion). You have to let them come on and off the bus. And just think, if you befriend this person it will change your whole relationship to them. If you understood them more thoroughly, maybe you could see these people for who they actually are. Maybe that person had a bad day. Maybe that person just lost their mother. Maybe they just lost their job. Maybe they’ve been abused and told they were worthless their whole lives. How would you feel now?
All thoughts have an origin all feelings have a basis. Don’t just take them at face level. Understand their root cause, befriend them, be patient and loving and kind so they open up to you. Create that space in your heart to be open to what may come up. It’s not easy. We have some very hard things buried away, or else we wouldn’t have fought so hard to not let them come back up again. We would have dealt with them already.
Be proud of yourself. That the feelings and thoughts you were once afraid of are now no longer a fear of yours. You know they will bring up hurt. You know they will bring up pain. But you know you are worth it. You know you are competent. You know you can cope. How do you know? You did it before and you will do it again. Resilience brings resilience. Self competence brings self competence. Self control and discipline brings more self control and discipline.
You should be so proud of yourself. Success begins in our mind. If you can take control over your thoughts you can take control over your life.
Perception is reality.
Choose to perceive your life in a way that is most beneficial to you. Regardless of what is right or wrong. There is no right or wrong. That is a construct in our minds. There is no good and bad. The “bad” helps us see the good, to be grateful for the good, and continue to learn, grow, and push ourselves. Welcome the tough, the hard, the intense, the strain, for it is needed to achieve the light. Sometimes God puts his most beloved children in harms way, in the fire, in order for them to see they can go through hell and back and live to see the day. To empower us. And believe that all we see as good or bad, in the end, is all for our greater good. Because the good let’s us appreciate life and the bad let’s us learn and grow to become more in this world and take the next step to our ultimate fulfillment, to finding our own Heaven on earth. Pleas, in the struggles, cry out to God and believe it.
You are loved, you are beautiful, you are whole. Please believe it.
The issue that superficially presents itself is often a trigger for deeper emotional pain or mental disfunction.
When you can work through the pain and limitations that are in your mind, see them objectively, you will be able to see that the issue here is avoidance.
Pain is not from the issue itself, but from avoiding the issue. From being mad at the discomfort. Get comfortable with being uncomfortable. Simply knowing that these emotions can’t hurt you. They are giving you a signal. Until we decipher the signal they will stay present with us.
So our only choice is to be present with them. Be curious. Be compassionate with our negative emotions. It’s not easy. I’m not saying it’s easy. But be empathetic. Ask yourself what you need right now to be okay? Ask what is truly bothering you. Be patient. Treat your inner self like a child. Your emotions are innocent yet misunderstood. They are only trying to teach you something. They are only trying so so hard to let you know what you need.
The more painful the emotion the more patient and loving you need to be. Nurture yourself in every way, mind, body, spirit.
You can’t push the negative away. My counsellor said it like this: your mind is like a bus. The passengers are like your thoughts and feelings. They will come and go. There will be passengers that you don’t like, that are rude or mean or you plain miserable. You can’t just punch them in the face (my suggestion). You have to let them come on and off the bus. And just think, if you befriend this person it will change your whole relationship to them. If you understood them more thoroughly, maybe you could see these people for who they actually are. Maybe that person had a bad day. Maybe that person just lost their mother. Maybe they just lost their job. Maybe they’ve been abused and told they were worthless their whole lives. How would you feel now?
All thoughts have an origin all feelings have a basis. Don’t just take them at face level. Understand their root cause, befriend them, be patient and loving and kind so they open up to you. Create that space in your heart to be open to what may come up. It’s not easy. We have some very hard things buried away, or else we wouldn’t have fought so hard to not let them come back up again. We would have dealt with them already.
Be proud of yourself. That the feelings and thoughts you were once afraid of are now no longer a fear of yours. You know they will bring up hurt. You know they will bring up pain. But you know you are worth it. You know you are competent. You know you can cope. How do you know? You did it before and you will do it again. Resilience brings resilience. Self competence brings self competence. Self control and discipline brings more self control and discipline.
You should be so proud of yourself. Success begins in our mind. If you can take control over your thoughts you can take control over your life.
Perception is reality.
Choose to perceive your life in a way that is most beneficial to you. Regardless of what is right or wrong. There is no right or wrong. That is a construct in our minds. There is no good and bad. The “bad” helps us see the good, to be grateful for the good, and continue to learn, grow, and push ourselves. Welcome the tough, the hard, the intense, the strain, for it is needed to achieve the light. Sometimes God puts his most beloved children in harms way, in the fire, in order for them to see they can go through hell and back and live to see the day. To empower us. And believe that all we see as good or bad, in the end, is all for our greater good. Because the good let’s us appreciate life and the bad let’s us learn and grow to become more in this world and take the next step to our ultimate fulfillment, to finding our own Heaven on earth. Pleas, in the struggles, cry out to God and believe it.
You are loved, you are beautiful, you are whole. Please believe it.
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